Panic in teens can lead to debilitating agoraphobia. Photo Credit: freedigitalphotos.net/stuart miles
What Agoraphobia Does to Teens
It’s heart-breaking to watch your teen go through agoraphobia. Teens who have agoraphobia are afraid of doing anything new or leaving a comfortable place. The pain they are in is almost indescribable. They are fearful of going to do things they once enjoyed, like extra-curricular activities. Their world is rapidly shrinking around them as they become increasingly panicky at the thought of leaving home.
What is Agoraphobia?
Agoraphobia technically means fear of the marketplace. Agoraphobic teens fear leaving a comfortable place or entering unfamiliar surroundings. Agoraphobia can manifest itself as fear of having a panic attack in public, anxiety over being unable to escape a crowded place, or other similar fears.
Panic Attacks
Agoraphobia is usually accompanied by panic attacks. Panic attacks are so unpleasant that many believe they are having a heart attack. In fact, thousands of people go to the hospital each year believing they are having heart troubles when they are actually having a panic attack.
The Results of Agoraphobia in Teens
If your teen has agoraphobia, they will be increasingly unwilling to leave their comfort zone because they are afraid of having a panic attack, getting stuck in a crowd, etc. Your teen will only go to certain places with certain people or even stop leaving the home entirely. Eventually, they may even ask you about homeschooling or cancelling some of their activities. They will likely become depressed because they are too anxious to do many of the things they used to do.
Treating Teens with Agoraphobia
Agoraphobia does horrible things to teens. Therefore, it is vital to get help for them. To do this, you must get a therapist who is willing to do online sessions and is used to treating anxiety in teens. Why online sessions? Because an agoraphobic teen is usually too nervous to go into the therapy office at first. Online sessions allow the teen to work up to going to in-person sessions.
Why do Online Sessions Help Teens with Agoraphobia?
Teenagers with agoraphobia are often anxious about coming into an office for an in-person session (though if they are willing to, that’s great! That means they aren’t afraid of all new situations). Teletherapy (online sessions) allows them to talk with a therapist without leaving their home. Also, teens with agoraphobia can be exposed to their fears from a comfortable base when they stay at home and do online sessions. Through online sessions, the teen can work towards coming to the office.
Defeating Agoraphobia in Teens
Agoraphobia makes it impossible for teens to enjoy life. It makes them afraid to go do activities they love doing, and they sometimes even are unwilling to go to friend’s houses, instead preferring their friends to come to them. However, with treatment agoraphobia can be brought to an end. Give me a call and we’ll talk about ways to defeat agoraphobia in your teen and help them enjoy life again.
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Getting good grades takes a lot of work. Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Strategies for Getting Better Grades
Hi teenagers. A lot of you struggle in school but would love to do better. You dream of seeing a 3.0 or even a 4.0 on your report card, but you don’t really know how to get there. However, you are capable of getting better grades! Here are some strategies I’ve seen clients use over the years that have helped tremendously.
1. Be Honest
Many of you blame your grades on teachers or other students. Countless teens say they put a lot of time into a class, but they don’t get the grade they deserved. However, that doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. If you are completely honest with yourself, some of these things might be true, but part of your lower grade is your responsibility. Blaming other people isn’t helpful or productive to getting better grades.
2. Put in the Time
It takes a lot of work to get A’s in classes. Students who earn A’s complete every homework assignment, miss very little school, and spend time studying. I’ve seen clients put in 5 or 6 hours throughout a week preparing for a test. Becoming good at something means doing everything you’re asked; becoming excellent means doing a little bit more.
3. Ask for Help with Getting Better Grades
A-students ask their parents and teachers to help them with areas they’re struggling in. When they don’t understand a subject, they go see their teachers at lunch, tutorial, or after school, talk to their mom and dad, or even get a tutor for a while. Don’t assume you’ll figure it out on your own; that hardly ever works. If you really want to start getting better grades, ask for help.
4. Use Time Wisely
Students who do well at school focus while they’re doing schoolwork. They set their electronics aside and really focus on their homework. They work during tutorial hour instead of socializing. This helps them learn the subject they’re studying, so they don’t fall behind in class.
5. Know Your Abilities
Teens who earn good grades are aware of their strengths and weaknesses. They don’t try and take an advanced math class if math is a struggle for them. Instead, they will take the regular paced class. On the other hand, if they are fantastic at history they might try an AP class.
Don’t Do too Much
Most importantly, make sure you’re not overloading your schedule. Even if you can handle the difficulty level of the work, it’s imperative you don’t put too much on your plate. It becomes overwhelming, and then you might stop wanting to try. You have to leave time for things you like doing.
Getting Better Grades Takes Work
Improving your grades takes work. Unfortunately, things won’t magically get easier. However, you can do it if you are diligent and organized. Ask your parents to help you with this if you need it. Don’t feel ashamed! Believe me, nobody has it together in every category of life. We all need help with some things, and we’re good at others.
You Can Do It!
Getting better grades may seem tough, but if you apply these tips you can succeed! Put work into school and you will be rewarded. You got this!
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Anxiety Related to OCD can be very frustrating for your teen. Photo courtesy of Marin from Freedigitalphotos.net
Why Teens With OCD Need Treatment
OCD is incredibly stressful for both your teen and the rest of the family. If your teen has OCD, they are in deep pain right now. To your teen, OCD seems like a huge wall slowy crumbling over them, and they increasingly feel helpless against the worry, fear, and anxiety OCD brings. However, OCD isn’t inescapable. With treatment, your teen can rise above OCD and break free from the pain it brings.
What is Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder in which people have intrusive thoughts and engage in obsessive behaviors. However, it has a straight-forward treatment protocol. Some basic steps are followed to help teens with OCD. Normally the treatment team includes both a psychiatrist for medication, and a therapist for cognitive-behavioral therapy. This blend is extra helpful when treating OCD.
Treating Teens with OCD
OCD is hard to deal with, but it is treatable. Though the specifics of treatment vary from case to case, it has 3 common steps. Let’s explore how to treat teens with OCD.
Step 1
First, the OCD must be defined. This means the person who has OCD works with a therapist to find out which obsessions (thoughts) lead to which compulsions (actions). For example,a person might obsess over leaving the stove on. The compulsion is to check if the stove is on several times before leaving the home. The therapist then helps clarify what the person is truly afraid of. This person might be afraid that their house will burn down, which represents loss of control, which is the underlying fear.
Step 2
The teen getting treated for OCD then meets with a psychiatrist. They explain to the psychiatrist how the OCD is manifested, and the psychiatrist prescribes medication accordingly. Psychiatric medication is extremely effective with OCD. When medication is combined with therapy it’s found to be even more helpful. Most of these medications take 4-6 weeks to take full effect.
Step 3
As the medication is building up in the person’s system, the therapist and client work together to confront the anxiety that is playing a role in OCD. When doing this, the therapist uses a process called “exposure and response prevention.” Let’s use that example of the person who’s afraid of leaving the stove on again. Say they want to make sure it’s off 6 times, so the therapist directs them to check only 5. Once they become comfortable with that, they will continue working to cease making sure the stove is off until they stop checking completely.
Using Baby Steps to Treat Teens With OCD
This process moves slowly. Someone with OCD cannot instantly reach the finish-line of treatment. If they are afraid of leaving the stove on, they can’t stop making sure it’s off right away. Treating teens with OCD requires baby steps, but every step is set at a pace that is both slightly challenging while still tolerable to the client. Though is may sometimes seem like it’s taking a while, using small steps is a very important part of the treatment process for teens with OCD.
OCD Is Conquerable!
OCD is hard on everyone in the house. It causes you stress, makes your teen frustrates your teen, and is difficult for everyone else too. The good news is that OCD is beatable! Give me a call, and I’ll be glad to talk about treatment for your teen. Together, we will beat OCD!
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Some teens get along really well with their parents. Photo courtesy of Marin and freedigitalphotos.net.
What a Close Relationship with Your Teen Looks Like
Having a close relationship with your teen is a beautiful thing. I have a few clients who have that closeness with their mom and dad. These teens share openly about their lives with their parents. They want to hang around the house. They want to bring their friends over, and their friends want to come over. Their friends all consider these parents to be a second mom or dad. Not only this, but these teenagers always respect their parents when they’re given instruction.
How to Have a Close Relationship with Your Teen
When great parents raise their children, there are several important things they do that create a close relationship between them and their teen. Here’s what I notice they do:
1. They NEVER make judgemental comments about their teen’s friends
These parents don’t assume their teenagers will behave badly because they have friends who occasionally make bad choices. Instead, these moms and dads tell their teenagers how grateful they are that they can trust their teens to make the right choice even when their friends aren’t. This causes teens to not only behave well but desire to make good decisions.
2. They are hurt instead of angry
When their teenager says something awful, makes a poor choice, does badly in a class, etc., these parents never react in anger. They feel hurt instead, and they let their teen see this. These teenagers absolutely hate to hurt their parents’ feelings, so they try to do well at things.
3. They take part in their teens interests even when it’s not enjoyable for them
The parents I’ve observed who have a close relationship with their teen don’t disparage their kids’ interests. In fact, they do the opposite. I’ve seen these parents attend concerts of bands they’ve never listened to, help their kids plan trips to go on with their friends, drive them all over just to spend time with them in the car, and buy clothes that don’t fit the style they prefer their teens to wear.
4. Their expectations are clear
All these parents have a line that their teens wouldn’t dare cross. Because they show so much respect to their teenager, their teen doesn’t want to disrespect them. Their teenagers don’t sneak, but then again, they don’t have to. They can tell their parents things without judgment.
You Still Have to Exercise Discipline
If your teen is truly making a poor decision, you do have to discipline them. However, to have a close relationship with your teen, you must do this gently, not angrily. Show your teen you’re disappointed, but you’re willing to help them do the right thing. On the other hand, only discipline your teenager if they’re really doing the wrong thing. Otherwise, respect their decisions and make sure you’re not being too controlling or too relaxed with them.
Working to Have a Close Relationship with Your Teen
Having a close relationship with your teen takes years of work. It’s hard to completely reverse things if you’ve settled into too friendly or too controlling of a role with your teen. However, putting the work in is worth it. Work to respect them and to enjoy them. It will be challenging, but try finding things to like about their friends and learn about what they like doing. Maybe you’ll enjoy it too.
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Skype therapy works really well for teens. Credit: Ambro via freedigitalphotos.net
Telehealth Therapy and How Well it Works for Teens
How well does teletherapy work with teenagers? It depends, but it’s likely telehealth therapy could be a great option for your teen.
When Telehealth Therapy is Good for Teens
There are a lot of teens who benefit from videoconferencing sessions just as much as the traditional face-to-face sessions. Telehealth therapy is especially good for teens who have families with busy schedules. For some, getting to the office every single week is too much of a challenge. For the teen to be able to do their sessions from home is helpful to the whole family.
When Schedules are Too Busy for Face-to-Face Therapy
Teletherapy can also be helpful for your family if there are other kids in the family who have commitments like soccer practices, tutoring, etc. It makes it easier on you if you’re unable to make the time to drive your child to therapy every week. If your child can stay home while they do therapy, you can take care of the rest of the things you have to do every day.
How Telehealth Therapy Makes Scheduling Easier
Telehealth therapy is also good for teens in that it makes it easier to schedule sessions. Therapists in our practice keep specific office hours, but we offer telehealth sessions Monday through Saturday. This way, it’s easier to find a time that works for you. If your adolescent has school, sports, a hangout with friends, etc., it’s nice for them not to have to miss an activity to be able to go to therapy.
Is Telehealth Therapy Right for Your Teen?
Are you wondering whether your teenage son or daughter will benefit from online counseling sessions? If the answer to all the questions below is yes, it is likely telehealth therapy is a good option for your teen.
Is your teenager conversational? In other words, do they speak readily?
Does your adolescent want counseling?
Can your teenager pay attention?
Is your teen moderately comfortable with technology?
Can your adolescent find a private place for their sessions for an hour at a time?
A Unique Side of What Teletherapy Can Do for Teens
I have been working with clients using telemedicine since 2010. The clients who have worked in this format have had a better continuity of care. I know that seems counter-intuitive, but this way clients can have a session when they need it no matter what point they’re at in life. With telehealth therapy, if a teen goes to college or moves away, they can still continue with online sessions.
Putting it Into Practice
If you know your teen needs therapy and you either live out of the area, you don’t have the time to make another appointment, or you just feel comfortable with video sessions, this is a great option for you. Please give me a call and we’ll talk about how telehealth therapy can work for you and your teen.
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Hello, I’m Lauren! If you notice your teen struggling, you might be feeling helpless, hopeless, frustrated or concerned as a parent. Try to remember, there is hope. I want to help your adolescent feel better. My hope is for them to enjoy their life again. I want them to feel confident they can handle whatever situations arise.
