by Lauren Goodman | Nov 20, 2025 | Therapy For Young Adults
Wanting to Quit When You’re Unhappy with Your First Real Job
Being unhappy with your first real job isn’t uncommon. Lots of people struggle with this. After all, it’s a big adjustment. Work is time-consuming and sometimes boring. It’s normal to want to quit. However, this doesn’t mean you should.
Try Waiting Six Months
Oftentimes, jobs can feel pretty miserable at the start. However, try staying with it for six months. Many times, it gets easier once you’ve settled in. You might even end up enjoying it! The important thing is to give yourself some time to adjust before giving up on the job.
Why Your First Job Feels Disappointing
Usually when young adults feel unhappy with their first real job, it’s because the job wasn’t what they expected. When you first get hired, you are assigned the most basic, boring tasks. For example, say you want to be a nurse. When you’re first hired, you likely will be doing a lot of basic procedures. This is the time when a lot of people would say, “Maybe this job isn’t for me. It’s really boring. Maybe I should quit.” However, don’t do this. If you stick it out for a while and work hard, you’ll almost certainly graduate to more interesting tasks.
Keeping a Positive Attitude When Unhappy with Your First Real Job
I know this is cliche, but it really does help. When you’re faced with a boring task, try to be grateful for it. After all, you are getting paid, and many people don’t have jobs at all. Simply trying to be grateful for things you don’t like can actually make them a little bit less intolerable.
You Can Do It!
Stick with the job for six months, remember you’ll soon be assigned more interesting tasks, and stay positive. If you still don’t like with your job after doing all these things, you can try looking at other career options. However, chances are, you probably won’t end up minding the job after all. Most of all, remember that you’ve got this.
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Lauren Goodman, MS, MFT
by Lauren Goodman | Dec 20, 2023 | Therapy For Young Adults
Ah, adulthood – the realm of bills, responsibilities, and decision-making. While it’s liberating to have control over your life, the journey into adulthood often comes with a side dish of anxiety. The overwhelming sense of responsibility and the fear of making the wrong choices can leave even the most confident individuals feeling uneasy.
If you are getting ready to venture out on your own for the first time, you don’t have to let your worries overcome you. Here is how to deal with anxiety over adulting.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
First and foremost, it’s crucial to recognize and acknowledge your feelings. Adulting can be tough, and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed at times. Give yourself permission to experience these emotions without judgment. Remember, you’re not alone in this; many of your peers are likely
struggling with similar feelings.
Break it Down
One effective way to tackle the anxiety around adulting is to break down tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. Whether it’s setting up a budget, navigating insurance paperwork, or even just grocery shopping, breaking tasks into smaller chunks can make them feel less daunting. Create a to-do list and celebrate each small accomplishment – it’s a great way to build momentum.
Prioritize Self-Care
Amidst the chaos of adulting, it’s easy to neglect self-care. However, taking care of your physical and mental well-being is crucial for managing anxiety. Ensure you’re getting enough sleep, maintaining a balanced diet, and incorporating activities you enjoy into your routine. Whether it’s reading a book, going for a walk, or practicing mindfulness, these moments of selfcare can significantly reduce anxiety.
Set Realistic Expectations
Setting realistic expectations for yourself is key to managing anxiety around adulting. Understand that no one has it all figured out, and it’s okay to ask for help. Avoid the pressure to have your life completely mapped out – life is unpredictable, and plans may change. Give yourself the flexibility to adapt to new opportunities and challenges as they arise.
Financial Literacy
One major source of anxiety in adulthood is often tied to finances. Taking the time to educate yourself about budgeting, saving, and investing can significantly reduce this stress. There are numerous resources available, from online courses to personal finance apps, that can help you build a solid financial foundation. Remember, small steps today can lead to a more secure financial future.
Celebrate Small Wins
In the hustle and bustle of adulting, it’s easy to overlook your achievements, no matter how small. Take a moment to celebrate your successes, whether it’s sticking to a budget, conquering a new skill, or successfully navigating a complex task. Acknowledging your accomplishments, no matter how minor, can boost your confidence and help alleviate anxiety.
Seek Guidance
It’s perfectly fine not to have all the answers. Seeking guidance from mentors, friends, or even professionals can provide valuable insights. Establishing a support system can be immensely comforting and can help you gain different perspectives on various adulting challenges. Don’t hesitate to reach out to someone you trust when you’re feeling lost.
Adulting may come with its fair share of challenges, but with the right mindset and strategies, you can navigate this phase of life with grace and resilience. If you are struggling to deal with anxiety about adulting, reach out to learn more about therapy for young adults. Take a deep breath, and let the journey into adulthood be a path of growth and self-discovery. You’ve got this!
by Lauren Goodman | Mar 6, 2020 | Therapy For Young Adults
It’s scary, but true. On occasion a teenager gets into a violent dating relationship. We all tell our kids that if anyone ever lays a hand on them, the relationship should instantly be over. However, teens are susceptible to the belief that someone can change.
Recently I worked with a client who consistently dealt with this very issue. After a few instances of telling me that he promised he’d be different, and then breaking that promise, she finally ended it. However, she continued to “protect” him even after things were over. She felt so ashamed that she had let things go on like that, that she still didn’t want to tell her parents he had been hurting her. She also didn’t want them to hate him.
It’s really easy to judge someone who gets into this situation. It’s easy to assume your son or daughter would never fall prey to abuse in a dating relationship. However, that’s a misunderstanding of how this situation arises.
Abuse doesn’t usually occur out of the blue. It starts with your teenager dating someone who is intensely interested in him or her. They want to spend tons and tons of time together. After a little while it becomes apparent that your teen’s boy/girlfriend gets pouty or angry when your child wants to see their friends. Before you know it, your teenager doesn’t see their friends anymore. Then you notice your teen has a lot of arguments with their significant other. The boy/girlfriend is quick to apologize, but has said some harsh things first. Most of the time your teen seems happy in the relationship, but when they argue, it’s extremely intense. That’s when the abuse starts. Both the abuser and the victim seem surprised the first time it happens. They both agree it will never, ever happen again. Things are great afterward so your teenager actually believes this, despite everything you’ve ever mentioned to them about abuse in a relationship. Besides, they’ve lost contact with all their friends, so they fall victim to the lie that they would be completely alone without this other person.
You and I both know without this other person they would re-establish their friendships, feel less anxiety, become social again, and overall feel a lot happier. It’s pretty challenging to convince your teenager of this though.
As Mom or Dad you can help your teenager stay aware that relationship violence does occur in teen dating relationships. You can stay very on top of their relationship. Strongly encourage your child to maintain their friendships as well, and do a lot of their dating in groups. Watch their moods. If they are morose sometimes it’s worth checking to see if it’s related to their dating relationship. If you see your teenager isolating from you, that is also cause for concern. Also, if you notice bruises on your teenager, this is major cause for concern. Adolescents do get bruises in sports, from running into things, etc., but consistent bruising is a huge red flag.
Being a parent is scary sometimes, and incredibly challenging. I don’t mean to give you one other thing to worry about, but I do want you to have an awareness that abusive teen dating relationships exist.
Helping teens grow and families improve connection,
Lauren Goodman, MS, MFT
